This was tucked away in my drafts since January 2014, I think its time to publish…
I know by the title of this blog entry one might think “oh she is going to talk about traveling to Europe or a spontaneous road trip”
Well, no.
I’m not going to bullshit you, im just going to tell you about my day.
It’s amazing how I stayed home all day today and at the same time I traveled to the farthest places.
My brother was getting out of his car this morning and as he stepped out he didn’t realize he had his phone on his lap, crack. Shattered phone screen feel like shattered dreams. So he asked for my rescue knowing I had an extra phone tucked away somewhere. I agreed to look for it because I needed to do some spring cleaning anyway. As I started to sort out my documents. Rummage through awesome pictures for tbt and others that should be burned, then pour acid on the ashes (jk destroying pictures should be a crime).
In the depths of my closet, in a corner tucked away was a bright blue carry on luggage. As I write this post, I say to myself that I should have never opened that blue box. Of course, like always, I do it anyway. The front pocket was the home of all my old cell phones. Victory! Did I stop there you ask? No of course not. After a short victory dance I proceed to check all the outside pockets to see if I can anymore lost treasures. Big zipper time. As soon as I peel open that zipper I remembered the day I packed this luggage. I went back to last year 2013 in May. I was moving out of my favorite town house. It was a dark time for me and my family. My eldest brother’s birthday. I know you’re thinking “oh, but birthdays are fun!” No they are not. Stop lieing to yourself lol yes they are fun but not this one. My brother didn’t make it to see that birthday. It was devastating because was going to be 47. Not only was he way too young to move on, he was one of those people who you could really talk to about life. He was a sensational debater. He had a lot to say. He always challenged me to think beyond my own emotional limitations and view facts. No one can make me do that. Just him. I didn’t always agree with it, I like to view life as a beautiful one, use my heart as well as my mind for decisions. I believe the more you use your heart the stronger it’s gets, so when it breaks it heals faster because it exercised constantly. You know, kind of like lumosity for the heart. I like to think his passion for politics and debate stemed from believing from his heart that the world can change my moving their hearts with facts we had right in front of us.
I loved him very much and need him everyday for the rest of my life. Through my little blue carry-on I revisited places that made me full happiness and others that consumed my being in sorrow.
—– That’s all I wrote, hope you enjoyed this very belated post!
Grieving is extremely difficult and different for everyone. Please feel free to comment or ask me anything on this subject below.
xoxo
Adri
adriknowsall 